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Things that Freak Me Out or Otherwise Make Me Uncomfortable

January 9, 2011

 

Can you guess what these crudely drawn images represent?

We all have them. Little pet peeves or phobias. Things that drive us insane. Images, sounds, and smells that haunt our dreams. For me, the touch of frequently washed wooden kitchen utensils is the touch of death.

There is something inherently wrong with using splintering, cracked spoons and spatulas to prepare anything intended for human consumption. Nothing can quite compare to the sensation of thousands of micro-splinters burrowing themselves into the skin of your dry, chapped hands (it’s extremely cold in OH right now and I have sensitive skin.)

I would rank this experience on a scale of “Freaks Me Out versus Makes Me Uncomfortable” as a solid “Freaks Me Out.” Seriously. I hate this feeling. The mere thought of it makes me cringe and my hands flinch.

Now hotels on the other hand are typically a firm “Makes Me Uncomfortable.”  Sure, the shower has weird things growing in the grout and the comforter looks like it lost a fight to an epileptic walrus  with a severe runny nose. OK, so there is a persistent feeling of general malaise whenever I stay in a hotel that I ascribe to the near certainty that there is a hidden camera somewhere in my room, but hotels don’t freak me out- they just make me uncomfortable.

Intentionally shocking or graphic pictures of people or animals with physical deformities do “Freak Me Out” however. I do not want to be shown a picture of a man with a rare case of tree-bark skin. I am not interested in viewing a picture of a conjoined kittens (if you started singing “we are Siamese if you please”- give yourself 2 points.)

Please don’t misunderstand me, it’s not that I don’t feel bad for these people or animals. I just don’t want to reminded all the time that the world is an imperfect place.

So what really freaks you out? Or maybe just makes you uncomfortable? Do tell.

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3 Comments
  1. Anonymous permalink

    Agreed, wooden spoons are just plain icky. I won’t even eat ice cream with that tiny wooden paddle thing they try and pass off as a spoon. Why, because it gives me chills (just thinking about it gives me the creeps) if my teeth scrape across it. And God forbid, said wood paddle scrapes the inside of the container. Would rather hear a dozen people all at once run their finger nails down a chalk board.

  2. Very true. I had completely forgotten about those flimsy wooden micro-planks that you sometimes get with ice cream.If ever I’m being tortured, I’d imagine the normal torture tools would be replaced with those “spoons” wrapped in bunches of raw cotton fiber like at the end of a Q-Tip.

  3. Anonymous permalink

    Thanks for creating my new vision of hell!!

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